Happy New Year

Woke to no heat.  Thankfully it was in the 30’s this morning.  I woke up about 3 am to pee, good thing this was not a “hangover” day for me.  I noticed it felt cold but too lazy to walk to the next room to “turn up the heat” which is what I thought was wrong.  Went right back to bed shivering.  I woke a couple of hours later colder, went to turn it up and felt the radiator cold as ice.

Damn!

It went out a few times last year.  We have an old boiler in the building but last year after new management took over, my heat has not only gone out once in a while, it’s not as warm as it used to be.  I have not seen the heating & cooling people out here for a while now, maybe saving money.  I have a space heater I turned on and made some hot coffee to warm myself after dressing myself in layers and then wrapping myself in a blanket fleece robe.

I waited for a while to call the caretaker, being a Holiday and all.  At 10 am when it was still out he said he had gotten other complaints and restarted the boiler again.  That was cause for celebration indeed.  Another slice of “better than sex” cake!

It’s alive!

Warm is good.  Cold bad.

Starting the New Year Right

I’m probably going to be folding up shop in 2019, not positive exactly when but……

Now you see me…

Soon you will not.

I have not been able to buckle down as I had planned to turn this site into what I wished it would be.  To be very honest, most things in my life and in the world are nothing like I planned or imagined.  I’m sure most of us feel this way.  Right now I’m tired.  I’m beat.  I know that this is part of the reason for my losing my passion to do what I had originally planned.

Many of my plans cost me WAY more than the projects were worth emotionally and financially, especially since internet traffic is becoming worse and most of it is now controlled by mega corporations that hold the little guys hostage with increasing fees for everything.  Especially advertising.  If you don’t let them extort you, you are dead to the online world.  They can bite me.  I will eventually be off the grid, just not sure how soon that will come to pass.

The problem with information being held hostage is pretty soon the world will become nothing but propaganda with only the very wealthy having a voice and controlling everyone and soon everything.  How will truth fit in?  This is VERY DANGEROUS.  Never before now have we experienced such a horrific scenario with cameras on every corner and absolutely no privacy anywhere.  These are indeed the end times and how I wish I was just a “fanatic.”  I will never forget when I first heard folk talk like this 40 years ago and I thought they were nuts.  Now we all have proof they were not.  They believed in scripture as the “Gospel” when I just used it to guide me.

Important scripture to remember right now, especially after Christmas.  I used to say “The Holidays” until the Word Nazis got “butthurt” over the word Christmas because “Christ” was in the mix.  They can “get thee behind me” in the name of Jesus!

I love spreading Jesus all over social media.  Many love it, that follow me specifically, but to others I am simply spreading the “butthurt.”

Winter joke! (still no snow here)

Another joke (?)

Speaking of bull, remember those BS news stories from a year ago about possible Chocolate shortages?  https://www.foxnews.com/food-drink/experts-say-chocolate-could-be-impossible-to-produce-by-2050  Problem with nonsense like “shortages” is they can and usually are falsely generated by various entities to carry forth their agendas and to control the people and/or profits.  As someone who comes from a long line of farmers, food shortages are almost impossible for any reason.

God created cocoa beans!

Praying for the world to find Jesus and appreciate what life is really for.

Life Really is a Bitch

And Then You Die.

I remember when I first heard this expression and laughed heartily.  It was after I had been through many trials in my life.  I think I was in my early 30’s at the time.

This is a true saying so stay here as long as you can and try to get as much enjoyment and fulfillment as you can without taking anything away or harming others.  That being said, serving others used to bring me much fulfillment until I could see what I was really doing.  Mostly “enabling.”

I don’t think it’s a favor to anyone to placate and make their lives easy when your life is so hard.  It actually makes no sense at all.  How is this coddled person ever supposed to develop character of their own?  How are they ever going to be tough enough to live in this cold cruel world when they have others in their life treating them like a new-born baby just so they can feel needed.

Anyone else see the cheery gif on Facebook & Twitter?

 Sad that this is where I am at right now and it’s not going to get better.  I can’t even pretend but I really don’t want to get into everything right now besides TWO of my brothers are critically ill at this time.

One of my brothers is hanging on after being in a coma for about a month, is able to eat and be transferred to a wheelchair after being completely bed ridden for which I am very grateful but another brother has now taken a turn for the worse with possible cancer and surgery in the next couple days which I am praying about.  Sad fact is I can’t snap out of it.  I can’t even make myself feel “Christmassy”  I should feel super happy and grateful that my brothers are still here, though just hanging on and I’m expecting a miracle for them but I think feeling such horrific stress that comes with a loved one on the brink and not knowing has been just too much for me.

I’ve tried, believe me.  Too many treats, trying to make myself feel better.  I’m even considering taking up drinking which I hate!  Wasn’t keen on this woman’s idea of fun either.

This one, cute, but also a no.

So I know why it’s so hard this time of year. I have posted a few things about my dysfunctional life but not much. I wanted to keep this blog as superficial as possible. I hate being real because real for me is not an option. I LOVE being in a dream world. Not one of drugs or being artificially high but one where I am lost in a good book, maybe an old movie, a painting or some act of creation, when art was my thing. I love being lost in beauty or something interesting. I hate dramas, never liked soap opera’s because I had enough real drama in my own life. I needed peace.  Strange that I find solace in social media now because sometimes you get some real weirdos.  Most are pretty cool though.  I enjoy it.

I was never alone in my life til the last few years. It’s been horrible and great depending. I actually hate being alone. At first it was pure torture and it sort of fragmented me, but now that I’m used to it in a way that I can deal with it, I have found that I don’t like being around others for too long.
I get uncomfortable for various reasons from boredom to trying to placate or figure out someone’s unpredictable behavior.  Oh the joys of human interaction!

I do know that since I have been hurt many times in my life, I no longer trust. When you don’t trust, you can’t be around others. You become sort of paranoid. I knew others like this. That started avoiding others and got like a hermit. That’s a little like I’m becoming now. I moved to an area I had always wanted to live when I had money, but now that I have no money I was able to move here. Boy, if that’s not the story of my life….A dollar short and a day late, damned if I do and damned if I don’t. I can never get my life timed right. Anyone else ever feel that way?  This picture shows why I now have zero tolerance for the narcissism of the typical alcoholic and all the trouble they cause for others.

Christmas 1960 where dad must have been drinking again. I feel so bad for my family and how sad or scared we all look.

Some do have their lives go along perfectly, their plans are never disturbed. This was never my case. I knew women that could plan when they wished to become pregnant and they did. I did the same, didn’t happen as I planned doing everything right. Same with other things in my life like working hard, saving, etc. Finally purchased a home and the mortgage crashed. I realized it really didn’t have anything to do with poor decision making but just bad luck. I actually used to feel that I was cursed and reading the Bible used to make me feel bad about myself in this regard. I felt that God didn’t bless me because I must be doing something wrong. This really turned me off religion. I since got into the actual Words of Christ so I get it. Life sucks, people suck and it’s just one of those things. All you can do is pray and never give up no matter how much you want to.


Truth is, you never know when something’s going to turn around. You never know if you can be a blessing for someone else and not even know it. So F the bad luck and BS of the world. Jesus overcame it all for us and the very least I will do is LIVE and walk in the Word to show that I appreciate it.

Happy Halloween 2018

I’m not very happy.  I am sicker today and so are some of my family members, one actually in the hospital as of this morning.  This is a devilish time of year for us for sure.

I’m sharing various Halloween pictures and images of days gone by.  I never made many of my children’s Halloween Parades due to work but I did try to schedule this off as many years as I could.  You have to be fair to the other mothers you work with.I really miss when kids ran around with fake weapons and no one batted an eyelash until evil started spreading like wildfire.  Also, boys actually could be boys.

One year I took my kids & their friends to a really fun family themed haunted forest in a park nearby.  You walked part of the way and then enjoyed a Hayride back for warm apple cider and donuts!  This was the only picture I took of a Zombie Elvis & his band.  Yes that is a mannequin directly behind him. 

These are some wax horror figures from the Niagara Falls, Canada Louis Tussaud’s Wax Museum from many years ago.

 

Devil’s Day Surprise!

I woke extremely ill and ended up in the ER of all days, “Devil’s Day.”  Indeed it was for me body “tricking” me and no treats to boot.  Praying & believing that everything has a blessed from God outcome.

I am posting this old work from 2001 from a site I used to have.

Memories from the Halloween’s I remember growing up.  So sad my relatives never took one picture of this fun time in our lives.

Please click on each page to enlarge to read.

Enjoy the fun little Halloween Song I wrote as a young mother for my first-born who absolutely loves this holiday.  It really has something when it’s placed to music.  Not so much when you just read it so I made it a little more interesting.

Personally I no longer celebrate it for various reasons.  I still like pumpkin and harvest decor though.  Love this time of year, normally.

 

 

 

 

Pumpkin Spice Goodies

Po’ Girl’s Recipe Page Soon to Come

PUMPKINPATCH

It’s pumpkin time!  I love pumpkin anything, almost.  If I get a young, sweet one, I will just eat the flesh with a little butter and salt.  Delicious as any good squash.  Problem is many don’t eat them til they are older so they think the taste is very blah.  It’s OK to eat as a vegetable just as any fresh squash is.  It has never gotten proper consideration on the dinner plate.

I always end up sick of Pumpkin Spice by Fall’s end.  From the creamers in my coffee to any recipe I can cram it in, I will do just that.  Was never a fan of actual Pumpkin Pie, not sure why.  I will eat it if it’s offered to me though.  A small piece smothered in whipped cream is not bad.

Please enjoy the following Pumpkin recipes with this disclaimer:  Results are not guaranteed and be aware that I often use less sugar in my recipes than most conventional recipes contain. 

Pumpkin Muffins

 

1 1/2 C flour (all-purpose or whole wheat)

1/4 C brown sugar

1 1/2 tsp baking powder

1 tsp cinnamon

dash of other spices of choice such as

nutmeg, cloves, ginger, turmeric or cardamom

1/3 C oil or melted butter

1 egg

1/4 C vanilla creamer

1/4 C Pumpkin Spice

or any creamer/milk with additional sugar for sweetness

3/4 C Pulp of Pumpkin or Butternut Squash

1/2 C well chopped Walnuts (optional)

1/2 C chocolate chips (optional)

This made a dryer batter with results more like a scone than a muffin when I baked them in muffin top holders. (not pictured)

Bake at 375° for approximately 15 minutes, but keep an eye on them.

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies

 

2 1/4 C flour of your choice

1/4 C wheat germ

1 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp salt

1 tsp cinnamon

dash of nutmeg, cloves, ginger or other spice of choice

1/2 C butter

1/2 C brown sugar

1/4 C sugar

1 tsp vanilla

2 TB Pumpkin Spice Creamer

2 eggs

3/4 C pulp Pumpkin or similar squash

10 oz Chocolate Chips (optional) for plain pumpkin cookies

Chopped nuts (optional)

Mixing & baking identical to making any chocolate chip cookie. The puree & creamer goes in with the wet ingredients, once all incorporated, then the dry, which should have previously been combined and set aside, is mixed in.

Bake at 350° for approx 9 minutes but keep an eye on them.

Cheesecake

 

Ritz Cracker crust

42 crackers (crumbled in food processor till done)

2 TB sugar

4-5 TB melted butter

Mix everything in bowl & press in the bottom of an ungreased 8″ Springform Pan with Parchment paper on the bottom. Please click on areas highlighted for more in depth information on how to easily cover the bottom of your pan if you are not familiar with how to do this.

Place the pan in the freezer while you prepare the Cheesecake filling of:

2 – 8 oz pkgs of cream cheese (OK if one is low fat, have not tried all low fat yet per critics)

3/4 C sugar

1/2 C sour cream

2 TB cornstarch

1 tsp vanilla

2 eggs

Using a mixer, cream the cheese and the sugar, then add the sour cream and additional ingredients mixing til combined for each one, one at a time.

To make this

Pumpkin Spice Cheesecake

you will merely add 3/4 C pumpkin puree & 1/4 C Pumpkin Spice creamer before adding the eggs                                            AND

place 1 tsp cinnamon & dashes of nutmeg & cloves (spices of your choice) to the cornstarch mixture changing up the amount by 1 TB to a total of 3 TB cornstarch.

Once it’s all combined and smooth, take out the crust and pour in the filling. Place in a pre-heated oven of 325° for approximately 45 minutes but please keep an eye on it, especially when you can begin to smell your baking.  One I baked just right, the other slightly over baked but eatable. 

Once it’s out, let it cool for at least an hour or two on the stove before trying to remove the springform band around it. The parchment paper allows it to slide onto the plate very nicely (Parchment will remain under the cake).   Never cut inside any pans if you can avoid it. I have never had to “slide a knife” around the edge as some instructions have advised. You should not ever have to do this.

Place the cheesecake in the fridge for a number of hours to completely chill. Some swear overnight, but I have not had to wait more than a few hours. Make sure it’s completely chilled before cutting.

Great Instant Pot Cheesecake recipe but you will need a special 6″ pan to fit inside the Instant Pot, plus some are not happy with the condensation that drips onto the cake.  Click for more info.

I plan on posting some Instant Pot recipes of my own very soon.

 

Drizzly Day in the Country

Just before 7:00 am this morning, I’ve always been an early riser, more Blue Jays than I had ever seen before swooped down in the drive to begin eating and drinking.  It was sprinkling and still very dark but I was able to make all of them out.  Knew that it would make an awesome picture with well over 10 Blue Jays only in this tight group.  Of course when I came back to that window after fetching my camera, at least half of them had flown away.  I quickly set the ISO to 800 but realized it was not working after the first two shots.  Not much better at 1600 ISO.  Hand held, dark and rainy.

I have been ill for over a week now with some kind of viral sore throat, bronchitis deal. I do get allergies around this time and I came down with it after running errands a couple of days in a row in thick fog. Even when I try to breathe through a scarf, it can still effect me adversely.
My apartment backs up to woods with all kinds of wildlife out here. Before I became ill I took pictures of some deer grazing right outside my window. I apologize for the poor quality of shooting through my screen. The windows have a special immovable screening that covers the entire window for safety and security or they are just cheap.

These are some shots I got a month or two before when I was outside, which are a little clearer. I try not to get to close and spook them as I did this fawn. His brother could care less I was there, he was hungry!

These are even earlier still.

My next post I will be sharing my Cheesecake recipe with you all!  First Cheesecake in a very long time and sadly it will not be my last!  Next one will be Pumpkin Cheesecake.  Forgot to take a picture of a mock pumpkin mug cake that I nuked in 90 seconds.  Came out perfect.  Just a plain cake replaced liquid with Coffee-mate Pumpkin Spice.  I will include this recipe when I complete the Pumpkin one within the next couple weeks only adding some actual pumpkin pulp next time.  I just purchased the sugar pumpkin to pressure cook in my Instant Pot.  I prefer fresh pumpkin to the canned any day.

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